I have always considered myself “normal;” meaning that I had “normal” periods of depression, anxiety and sadness about lifes issues. Somehow I had always lifted myself up from whatever had gotten me down . . . until this past year.
It was a tough one–I had suffered a miscarriage, was having problems with my mom (just arguing a lot) and then my mom’s health went downhill. The thing that affected me the most was that I made a horrible decision to change jobs. I loved the job that I had for the most part, but if I stayed in the position I would have to move my family to a more expensive area at some point. When this opportunity came up, I took it immediately because I was afraid if I didn’t, nothing would be available when I was ready to leave.
Taking this job was the worst decision I’ve ever made in my life. All year from Sept 2010 until Sept 2011–I cried every day and every night, I continuously beat myself up, saying that I was stupid and a bad decision maker, focused on our mountain of debt constantly (I had taken a bit of a pay cut) and made my husband and everyone around me miserable. I even ended up getting pregnant during this time and didn’t enjoy my new baby because I was so focused on the misery of my job and my bad decision. My husband would find me down the basement crying for hours and hours by myself. I had even contemplated suicide and thought of all the ways I could end my life because I thought I had ruined our lives by taking this job that I absolutely hated/hate.
When I came back to work from maternity leave, I had lunch with a friend that I don’t see very often. He noticed the negative vibe I was giving off and the anger that was taking over my life–he said he had never seen me like that before. He recommended that I read The Secret. At this point I was willing to try anything. I went to the bookstore 2 times and they were out of the book. So I figured “oh well.”
A month later I was visiting another friend who had moved into a new house. On my way out I mentioned The Secret to her and she said “Oh, I have the book upstairs. It works.” I couldn’t believe that she had it. I read the book once and read it again. It just hit home in every aspect of my life and I it really just made sense to me.
Ever since then I have been practicing what I learned. It’s not easy at times, but whenever I feel myself shifting towards negativity, I think of my kids and husband and all I have to be grateful for–even if it’s for light traffic on my commute or food for lunch! Let me tell you what’s been happening since I have put The Secret to work–I have a mountain of debt, credit cards, student loans, you name it. Within the past month, my student loans have been either lowered or defered (when I had asked in the past I received a NO from both companies), I have received 2 checks in the mail as “refunds” and things have gotten better and better financially.
I have an application in for my dream job–and similar agencies aren’t even hiring right now. Even little things have been happening, such as good parking spaces in crowded malls, no lines when I check – out. I know it may sound crazy, but it’s true.
I want to thank Rhonda and her team for bringing The Secret to us. It is truly life changing! I will keep you posted on the job! Thanks for listening to this long story–but I just wanted to share my belief in The Secret and to let others know that they, too, can be happy.