I moved to the US in my 20’s married to a medical student. We were starting our married life with a lot of hopes and dreams. We built a life for ourselves, first in Chicago where my husband made a big name for himself and then we moved to San Diego to raise a family. There we created medical clinics for Latinos since we knew the culture and the language. It was a happy place to work, our patients were always so grateful to have a place where they could express their needs and their fears. We raised two wonderful children, had a lovely big house with a swimming pool and a guest cottage that we built and decorated with our own hands. We even had tennis courts and fruit and vegetable trees. I adored my house! It had been in my dreams and now there it was. We had many friends, parties, trips and family.

Then one day I was in my 50s and just like that, it was all gone. The clinics went bankrupt after years of success. Our 30 year marriage broke, kids off on their own, my mom dies, my dad has memory loss, we had to sell the house to try to recover the clinics. We just put good money after bad. One day I was at the gas station near my little apartment where I had moved when the marriage ended. I was going to put on some gas to go the next day to look for a job and I had nothing left in my debit card and 15 cents in my wallet. I had no idea who I was anymore, I had lost my own identity somehow, married for so long and totally dedicated to my family. Now alone, what was I going to do? I didn’t know that at the time. All I knew was that I still had dreams and hopes and desires and most of all, I had so much love to give and nobody to give it to.

So I started by opening a blog and writing about my life. Not only what I was living but what I was wanting was there too. I opened it to anyone who wanted to read it and kept on writing. At times I had no energy or concentration to write but I never gave up. I was ridden with fear most of my life, fear of exactly what happened to me. Of losing everything we had worked so hard for when we both came from very humble beginnings. When we lost it, I realized I was still very much alive and now I didn’t have anything to be afraid anymore. Now I could start from scratch and see what I was capable of and not stop till I found out.

Long story short, since then I have lived in Israel, in Mexico and now I’m back in the US for the last 3 years. I got remarried 3 years ago to a wonderful life partner and a great cook. Together we laugh most of the time of course. I became an Interpreter for a large school district in the State of Washington. We have both been discovering together, more and more of our strengths and they are growing at a fast rate. Now I see changes as opportunities and losses as lessons. Now I look for ways to bring joy into people’s lives. It could be by interpreting so they understand what is going on with their children’s education or so they won’t be afraid when they have to go to the doctor and not know how to tell them what they need. I know we will buy the house of my dreams. That house with the swing for two, the house on the tree for the grandchildren. The big table outside by the river that runs by our land that grows everything organic to feed all our families.

Not bad after having 15 cents in my wallet and left alone in my 50’s to start from scratch. I am always in deep gratitude to my life adventures for giving me all that contrast so I could understand it was I who was in control all the time. I hope you enjoyed what I write and my own views of life.

Hugs xoxo
Anita

www.youneedanita.blogspot.com