How The Secret Evolved From Within.
Growing up, it was immediately evident to me that I was different. At a very young age I realized that I was gay. I lived in a small, religious town, so from an early perspective, it felt like I was the only one of my kind.
I very quickly learned that my attraction was “sinful” and “wrong in the eyes of god.” I spent a good part of my childhood all the way up to my high school years both hiding who I was, and praying for god to change it. This turmoil resulted in years of depression and stress as an outcast.
Finally, I began to question the mindsets around me. I knew with all of my heart that I was not a bad person. I finally started to see others like me in my high school years. I was tired of pretending to be something that I wasn’t and so I came out to my parents. They sent me to a counselor who had a PH D in theology rather than psychiatry.
Despite this, I found myself enjoying talking to him because I was able to challenge the traditional Christian perspective of my life. Finally, I was able to fully convince myself that who I was was not wrong. Once that was true, I was able to convince others around me including my mother and sister.
The years that followed were much happier and I saw that as I accepted myself, I found more and more people who accepted me too. Finally, just two years ago, I found the person who I am in a relationship with today. We moved into an apartment together and started a life. Things were coming together but I still felt that something was missing.
I was not able to make my bills and my car was falling apart, a huge setback since I worked three jobs and was going to school. But none of that mattered. I was happy to have found this person and I knew that some how something would work out.
On a seemingly random day about six months ago my boyfriend told me he wanted me to watch this documentary with him that he had watched some time ago to see what I thought of it. This documentary was The Secret. He had watched it, but didn’t know completely what to think.
As I watched the movie I felt like everything in my life was beginning to come together and make sense. Since I had reached adulthood I considered myself agnostic with no real beliefs. I had an open mind and listened to all of the ideas around me but I never felt like any one idea in particular was right or wrong. After watching the program I thought about it constantly and found myself re-watching it over and over. I decided to put it to the test.
I just believed that I would have a new car. I had no idea how it would happen but I believed it with all of my heart. Within a month I upgraded to a reliable car that I love; there was no way I could have afforded it, but a way was made.
I was ready to test it again. I was tired of working so many hours and I needed something that would sustain me without exhausting myself.
There was an opening for a technical analyst with ADP. I knew that most of the people there had a degree and were probably much more qualified than me. This is a fortune 500 company and I knew that there were tons of other applicants. All I knew was that there was something out there for me and I took a shot. I also kept visualizing myself living in abundance.
They interviewed me twice, each interview an hour in length. After a couple weeks I heard back from them and found out that I had the job. They were starting me at a higher pay grade than I expected and I was the youngest person in my department company wide.
The past two months have been incredibly different. While I have been going through company training, I have been flown around with company money, given a company credit card, been picked up in limos and stayed in nice hotels. My checks have caught me up so that now I can pay my bills.
Before this job, I worked at a subway restaurant, a fine dining restaurant and as a math tutor at a tutoring facility. Now I work in a large building downtown Portland that has great benefits, tuition assistance, automatic 3 weeks of paid vacation my first year, a gym, and a ton of good people. I finally have something to believe in and it is this law of attraction. I will live by it always.