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Apology From My Love!
Submitted by: Kiwi
SudanQueen of Gratitude. Learning to appreciate every part of the LOA journey
I’ve been off and on, on this LOA journey for about three to four years. When I’ve fallen off, I’ve known better and have gotten super frustrated trying to get back into the habit and not seeing instantaneous results. However this is a lifestyle that I don’t believe should be utilized just for some material possession that makes me happy for a minute second. When I know better and don’t do better, it affects me. So, to my story!
I had been attempted to get back on to that feeling of overwhelming gratitude. I just allowed life to take control of my thoughts and feelings. Well I’m in a friendship/relationship with a very special man. Because of our work, it hasn’t gotten as deep as I’d like it to. Actually it’s more because of our communication patterns. He often feels like I’m disrespectful to him when it has never been my intention. I come across very blunt to say the least.
Well one day we got into a work related argument. I hadn’t known that I was on speaker and his friend and his friend’s wife were in the background listening to me. It came to the point that during our conversation, he disclosed the couple had heard our conversation and also thought I was being disrespectful.
This broke my spirit because I thought that during the time that I had gained a friendship with this man, that we had a trust. I felt violated and betrayed. I confided with one of my older sisters who happens also to be a therapist. She advised me to confront him, and based on what he said would determine whether or not I should move on or take this friendship seriously.
I called him that night and he ultimately told me that he didn’t care that I felt violated and that it was my personal issue. I was “Wowed” that someone I thought cared and loved me would say such a hurtful thing. However, I let it go and knew that it was time for me to move on.
I knew I loved him and we were meant to be. However, I couldn’t live and interact with him in the romantic and loving way I normally did. I decided that I was going to be strictly professional and not allow boundaries to be crossed. I also wanted him to feel that he could no longer cross boundaries because he had chosen not to be my friend. I knew this could be somewhat confusing because even though we had a friendship, it had also started to turn into a romantic relationship even though we don’t have the title.
So I decided to let it go and focus on meditation, gratitude, and forgiveness. Luckily, the following day he didn’t show up to work so that was easier for me. However, the day afterwards, I really concentrated on reading these testimonials for The Secret, doing meditation, reading the bible, reading Dr. Emerson Eggerich’s Love And Respect book and doing the The Magic Practice of The Magic Wand. I even used it on him for his happiness. I decided that I didn’t know how, but I was going to have the faith that he was going to apologize to me for violating my privacy and trust. I didn’t see it happening any time soon because he was super adamant that he didn’t care about how I felt.
I had to contact him for work related things. I made up my mind that I was going to stay strictly professional, calling him “Mister” and responding “Yes sir.” Well, I was texting him work related things and guys! Guess what!? In the midst of our conversation, he felt that something was wrong and apologized so sincerely to me. I wasn’t even expecting it! This was just two days after the incident!
When I say, letting go is where it’s at, I can’t even begin to explain or express to you how much it renewed and restored my faith! This is the beauty of life! Let’s get our gratitude and appreciation on! It’s such a beautiful and overwhelming love that I feel!
Thank you, thank you, thank you so much Rhonda Byrne for all that you do! Your work has been such a blessing in my life!