The Magick of Belief
Well I do not know where to start – for years I used to think negatively and even worse I actually thought it was perfectly normal to think in such a way. I had bad experiences, in luck, situations, relationships in general friends/family/love/money, you name it and I had it – but I thought I deserved what I got. I had thought by thinking negatively I could never be disappointed in life, well of course generally I wasn’t because I was permanently disappointed without even realising it!
I had always travelled in my life, even as a kid with my dad’s job we moved a lot, this left me finding it hard to trust people and make genuine friendships. I was so eager to make friends I would sell myself short practically, paying for everything and felt I was worthless and why would they want to be friends with me. My teenage and early twenties were much the same filled with a desperate unhappiness that never subsided and it was pretty evident now looking back from the outside, that this was the case the way I abused my emotions, tormented myself in negative thoughts which led to negative experiences and an all round deeply depressing life.
Then I decided I was going to make a change and move to Spain, I had always wanted to so I did it! A one way ticket, no job had some family friends to stay with for couple of weeks and thought why not…what if … was my question so I decided to explore it! What I didn’t take into consideration was that your feelings follow you – just because you move countries, cities etc they come back to you after the climax of the change of scenery!
Then I thought finally yes, I have settled I had a good job, great friends, a lovely flat and life was good! Then I met someone and wow, it was an instant connection and I was swept off my feet with love. I was so happy and then it came back the niggling negative thoughts… they crept in and one thought multiplied and I thought oh my how could this person feel for me, they don’t really feel the same, I do not deserve them, they’re too good for me. Well the more I convinced myself that, I could not believe how lucky I was, the more it became true. In the space of a few weeks what went from being the happiest moments of my life turned into the most sour and soul destroying moments where I lost the love that I had fallen for, my job, and then 2 months later my flat. I had nearly lost my friends through my deep rooted negativity pushing them away however they could see what was happening and I still to this day feel very lucky that I do attract such loving people in my life.
I came across a self help book and read and reread it. I was supposed to have counselling – my counsellor after 2 sessions pointed out that I didn’t need to come back again as had turned my self around. I felt so great and started to use positive affirmations in my life – I soon then got a job in the industry that I had wanted, a new flat with a great friend of mine. Another one of my friends who lived not far had invited me round for dinner we were having a catch up and had told him what happened over the last few months – he pulled out the book ‘The Secret’ and said read it, it will change your life! So I did and it did – I have people in my life that love me for me – I have a great relationship with my family, I have a great job and my finances are always increasing from everywhere. I have a beautiful and adoring person in my life who I love dearly and equally they feel the same for me.
I really want to say thank you to Rhonda her team of The Secret for helping me change my life – my thoughts are more powerful than I had ever given them credit or even realised. For this I am most grateful and testing times remind me that I need to check my negative thoughts and remove them all including the negative people if there are any! Thank you for teaching and guiding me to love myself and those around me.