Long lost sister
I have been in a fight with my family for nearly a decade. My brother and sister and I all stopped speaking to each other when my Father died. It was due to old abuses, in-fighting, anger and pain at the time of the funeral. It has plagued me greatly over the years since our mother also died when we were 18. I have felt orphaned and alone for so long.
I have fallen upon extremely difficult times in my finances, career and other areas and I have never felt so grievous and alone as I have lately. I have cried so hard from the pain that I have scared me to my core… a feeling that I am going to wind up injuring myself if I don’t get some kind of help or peace.
My friend who was very worried about me sent me The Secret dvd this week and I watched it twice on Thursday this week. And one of the parts that really, deeply spoke to me was when one of the men in the film said, watch it happen. Think of someone in your life who you miss and that person is going to appear in your life. Just watch it happen. I didn’t think of anyone in particular when he said that, but that moment was profound to me because I imagined the joy it is to feel that connection of someone you miss and love coming back to you.
Then after I watched the movie, I wrote down some ‘gratitiude’ statements on my computer and shut my computer down before I went to bed. When I woke up the next morning, I turned on my computer and opened up my email and MY SISTER had written me an email, after a period of silence over 8 years long, and she had written me that she had heard through a mutual friend that I was in trouble and she was here to help me. I cried so hard and so long I gave myself a gushing bloody nose, it felt like I was wailing because I was so ashamed that she knew I was hurting and lost my job, but then I realized too, that pain and that shame and that wailing that came out of me was because it felt like something inside of me broke apart–It was the anger and resentment flooding out of my heart. It was like ripping off a bandaid metaphorically.
I called her later that day and we talked for 3 hours on the phone and even laughed a lot. There is hope for us. We are different women today, and maybe we are older now and able to cherish what we have as it might be gone forever.
I woke up this next morning to write this story. This is what has happened barely 48 hours into me embracing the miracle of The Secret.