I spent 13 years married to a man who was not what he portrayed himself to me. His efforts to come across as someone I could trust and who loved me were impressive and convincing during our year long romance. Cracks started to appear within the first year of our marriage. I soon found myself pregnant and gave birth to a beautiful baby girl just before our first wedding anniversary. Shortly thereafter, I began to realize things were not what they seemed. I had married a stranger. He was deceptive, cunning and cruel. Over the years, I could sense only loathing from him. He was more often than not, harsh with the children. We walked on eggshells whenever he was around us. I felt trapped in a gilded cage.
In February 2004, I dropped to my knees and cried out for God’s forgiveness. I poured my heart out to him in despair. I knew what I had to do. That spring I filed for divorce which triggered four long years of turmoil, abandonment and poverty at the hands of my husband.
In 2007, I had a vivid dream of a spacecraft lifting off. The image repeated itself three times and I heard an audible voice saying, “You are launched!”
Left with precious little the divorce was finalized in 2008. Unable to secure steady employment, I struggled to make ends meet and keep a roof over our heads and food in the fridge. Legal bills placed me further in debt. I went from being a generally healthy person to struggling with recurring and often severe illnesses during that time. Everything, I ventured to do would always fall apart. Doors were constantly closed to me. In 2010 I asked God to help me understand, not wanting to believe this was my fate.
Shortly thereafter, I happened to be roaming around a bookstore just to kill some time. I came across The Secret, I picked it up and began to read through it. I was so quickly immersed in its pages that I was startled when my daughter tapped me on the shoulder 10 minutes later. I felt an unexplainable attraction to this book and a glimmer of excitement to fuel my hope began to emerge. I bought both the book and then the DVD later.
I created a list of dreams and wishes which included wealth, prosperity, health, love, and travel. I focused on these things every morning and throughout the day. Things did not improve immediately but my spirits were lifted.
I had created an LLC in September of ’09 but it went nowhere and instead drained me of what little funds I had left. By the start of the Fall of 2010, I found myself in an online relationship. I didn’t think I could ever trust a man again. I had labeled myself “damaged goods”.
But God used this relationship to show me there are in fact “good” men who are worthy of my trust out there. The relationship lasted five months. I broke it off when I realized he was unwilling to meet me half-way. Once again I fell into depression and was suddenly gripped with fear. I cried out to God and went online to ask for prayer from a group of friends I had developed at a Christian chat site. It was that day that I met Richard. He just happened to log on to the site not five minutes before I did and generously spent an hour of his time praying with me and encouraging me.
We kept in touch every day and a solid friendship developed. I began to date locally but found myself comparing my dates to Richard, who was in another relationship at that time. I sat down one evening, and envisioned myself happy and in love. I spoke out of forgiveness for my ex and many others and declared my faith saying, “I don’t care what has happened or is happening, I choose to be happy, I choose to love them all.” The emotions were so strong within me I felt I would burst. I envisioned them as a big bubble full of my dreams, full of love, forgiveness and hope. I clearly pictured myself, in love and happy. With tears streaming down my face I released this “bubble” and envisioned it rising up out of me into the atmosphere, up to the heavens. It was an amazing experience!
Suddenly, within a few short weeks thereafter, my friendship with Richard developed into a beautiful and fulfilling romance. I traveled to see him in England twice and he has been to see me three times. Now, just seven months later, we are engaged to be married, living in a wonderful new home in the U.S. and building up the business I nearly gave up on. It’s just amazing how quickly and easily things have fallen into place for us! Total strangers go out of their way for us. I often find myself at the right place at the right time. Richard and I are perfect for each other in every way. I firmly believe that God has in fact placed the Law of Attraction into each of us. I harness it using gratitude and deep happiness everyday. My story is not over, it’s just getting started.