It started with a dream…
Looking at other people’s newborn babies, I longed for my very own. My partner and I lost our first bubba very traumatically about a year and a half prior, and I was eager to have another baby. However no luck. The longer it was taking to become pregnant again, the more I became stressed that I was not pregnant. My partner and I did a couple of things to pass the time and to forget that we didn’t have what we both so desperately wanted. We went on a cruise, partied with friends, and although I would kiss all my friends babies, deep down I ached because that baby wasn’t mine.
One day we drove to the beach, with a bottle of water and a magazine, and I laxed out in the sun. In that magazine was an article about how a woman who had been blessed with a baby after watching The Secret. In fact, she had twins! I was at that point in my life that I would try anything to get what I wanted. That night I went to the video store and hired out the DVD.
After watching The Secret I was so captured, and everything seemed so clear to me. I was in this bubble of bliss. I would walk around my house saying “I am pregnant” with a matter of fact tone. I was truly believing that I was. A few months later I was a day or so late for my monthly cycle. I was so eager to test. When it came up negative I wasn’t disappointed, rather I questioned why it was wrong, because I truly believed I’M PREGNANT. A week after that I went home early from work after feeling a little groggy. I went home and fell straight into bed. While asleep, I dreamt that I was with this woman who had 9 babies. She asked me which one and I chose this healthy baby boy. He seemed quite big in my dream, like 10lbs healthy! After that I also chose a girl who was smaller in comparison but still fine. I woke up feeling weird, as the dream really caught my attention. Still feeling groggy, I found myself getting a drink of water and then falling back asleep. This time, the woman said, “Take a test, the line will be flat.” A big noise outside my window woke me up, however I felt weird again after having that dream. I had one test left from the last time I had tested. I laid in bed for 10 minutes wondering whether I could handle another heartache, or would I waste a perfectly good test on a dream. Finally, after having the sudden urge to pee, I thought, why not. So I took the test with me. As I watched the test complete itself, I found myself looking at a line. Still a little groggy and not thinking straight, I thought it meant negative as the line was not horizontal, rather it was vertical. When a horizontal line appeared over the vertical line I jumped and realised I didn’t know what Positive meant on this particular test! I ran back into the bedroom to grab the instructions, and there it was. A horizontal line meant positive. I looked at the line again and one of those lines had disappeared. Suddenly I realised I was holding the test the wrong way. I HAD ONE FLAT LINE! I was so ecstatic.
My partner and I are over the moon, and are expecting our baby this December. 🙂 And other than the dream, I have no-one else but THE SECRET to thank. 🙂