I underestimated the power of The Secret
What should have been one of the happiest times of my life turned out to be one of the worst. Or so I thought at the time. Last month I started University. But I was far from ecstatic about the thought of immersing myself into education once more.
Years and years of studying, studying and more studying had left me feeling like I wanted to be ‘free’ and away from the stresses that comes with learning, like exams, coursework etc. What made things worse was that I wasn’t even sure if I’d like the course I’d chosen; however there was no way I was going to quit. I knew it was in my best intentions to try it out.
The first day arrived, and I was far from positive. I didn’t even know what positive felt like any more, having felt so bad about the whole thing for days and days. What made things ten times worse was that I felt shy beyond words – to the point where I wanted to dig a hole and bury myself to stop people from looking at me. I was suffering with a severe social anxiety, and immersing myself into a building full of students was far from my comfort zone.
What made things even worse was that I was having trouble making friends. The first day passed, then the second, third and fourth, followed by the fifth. I wasn’t making friends at all. The negative mood that I originally held for the idea of university hadn’t shifted, and now the feeling of being alone and unnoticed was chucked on top.
I spent the first five days crying. A lot. I felt so upset beyond words. I frantically read The Secret in desperation. I’d previously read the book time and time again, however just reading the first few chapters and reminding myself of the teachings gave me a huge boost; basically a kick up the backside.
I thought back to my original negative thoughts of university life, and realized that there laid my biggest problem. My brain was basically saying: ‘I don’t want to be here at university,’ and the universe was giving me more reasons for not wanting to be there; by means of being unnoticed by everyone, almost like an incentive for me to finally pack up and leave.
What did I do? I got straight up and changed how I thought about the course. I AM lucky to have been given a place. I HAVE so many friends. I AM liked by everyone. And you know what happened? Well, for a week or so, nothing. I didn’t feel positive ones. I didn’t feel hope. Or courage. Just depression.
And then today, one week on, everything is different. Literally this morning everyone was saying ‘hello’ and ‘good morning’. People in my class who I’ve never spoken to – but imagined in my head I would at one point – randomly came over and started speaking to me!
When I was at my low point a few weeks ago I laid in bed and imagined situations which I wanted to happen and questions that I wanted to be asked. In my minds eye I could see myself in those situations and genuinely believed they were going to happen. Today I was asked those questions and experienced those situations.
Even in the darkest times there was a part of me – somewhere in my subconscious – that still held onto The Secret. And now I’m seeing the manifestations.
The Secret is there ready and waiting for you…. just have the courage to let it in – because when you do you’ll NEVER regret it!