How I’m believing in the unseen
I wanted to write this even though my life hasn’t really changed for the better yet. But my belief has.
So please bear with me…
About just over four years ago, after the birth of our first child, my wife got really bad depression. She had to give up her career which didn’t help her self-esteem, even though she was put under a lot of pressure. But we got past that and moved on with our lives. A year later she fell pregnant again with our second child. Unfortunately not soon after she started having blackouts, sometimes 5-6 times a day, which meant her quality of life was very limited let alone her freedom. We were living with her family at the time as we could not get a mortgage or anything. Even though I was working I still needed to take a lot of time off as she struggled a lot emotionally. We tried desperately to get on the property ladder but it was one knock after another trying to get somewhere.
About 9 months later we found out that she was pregnant again, but we was told there is a strong chance the baby might not be well and might not survive birth. After constant tests, some not too pleasant, and a lot of praying, the baby turned out to be ok and was a lovely little girl.
Due to the pressure of all this the depression kicked in so bad that June last year my wife tried to commit suicide. after attending hospitals and help and support via specialists we are slowly turning things around.
I started to think, is it me, am I bad luck, and I started having really bad thoughts about myself, especially my self worth.
On Christmas eve last year my work called me in to basically give me an ultimatum of my career or my family. I chose my family. So I quit my job to help get my family back on its feet.
The reason for this story, even though it’s still quite fragile, is that over a year ago I went into a bookstore looking for a self-help book and was attracted to the book The Secret. It’s the teachings and the knowledge that has got me through this hard time. Even though I am thankful that I still have my wife and am grateful for three lovely children, one day I’m gonna turn things around for my family and one day put an ending to this story. For now, thanks for the knowledge and guidance that The Secret has given me… I’ve got a lot of goals and dreams which one day I WILL MANIFEST!!!!!! BECAUSE MY PASSION AND BELIEF IS STRONGER THAN MY CIRCUMSTANCES.