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Cold Winter To A New Blossoming Spring
Submitted by: Mariana Rivera
Lancaster, CACollege student and aspiring artist
My story starts in the summer of 2012.
My then boyfriend of 2 years found out that I had cheated on him. I never meant to hurt him in that way of course and deeply regretted it. He forgave me but it obviously left a deep scar in him and we later got into fights and almost never ending arguments. I understood that sorry wasn’t enough but I just wished he wasn’t so cold to me. We were on and off constantly. I tried hard to do anything to make him happy and love me like the way he did in the last 2 years but obviously his feelings day by day just faded away. It was painful for me to realize this, and one day we just talked and he explained how I was no longer as important to him like before, and that he no longer loved me, and how most of his friends ( who were also my friends), told him it was better to leave me. Also he had ambitions to go to a UC college and that a long distance relationship would never work out. I was devastated by his words and hurt to the point to where I soon went to independent study ( a kind of home school ) because I just didn’t want to see his face anymore. Back then it was painful for me.
My friend later told me about The Secret but I took it the wrong way when I thought I could immediately get my ex back. I tried and tried with every possible being I tried but he blocked me on Facebook and said very harsh things about me.
I thought about killing myself since I had phone calls from people calling me a whore and so many things. Basically it felt like the whole world had abandoned me. Then I later sent an email to The Secret website about my situation and the wisest advice they gave me was the the universe obviously has shown me that maybe my ex isn’t at all The One. At first it was hard to accept, but gradually I began to think if I let go of the old situation and memories there’s a high chance to begin with someone completely new and start all over with out any disputes.
So I watched The Secret movie (helps a whole lot) and read the book. I had good thoughts about how good I will blossom out to be. Turns out I became no longer really skinny and frail looking but developed a slender dancer like body. My hair grew, my legs looked fuller and nice, and my face became more glowy and flushed. I felt beautiful for once and felt good about myself and thought about my good physical traits and it helped a lot since I always had low self esteem. But for once I actually thought I was the most beautiful person inside and out 🙂 I also thought about my career in art and beauty and I even made a vision board about how amazing I soon will be and what a legendary artist and writer I will be.
I also meditated and thought about finding a great guy that I will surely last with. I described him as tall, handsome, has nice dark long hair, and an amazing and kind personality which will love me for who I completely am. I wrote about him and I and how we will turn out to be.
So a couple weeks later I took the bus to my independent study program area and the bus I took also takes some college students to this community college nearby my study program. One day I made eye contact with this boy that goes to the college. I thought he was really cute but that he already have a lot of girls in line for him. But for some reason I just wanted to write in my journal how it would be nice to see him more often. Little did I know how big that little sentence in my journal led me to where I am now.
So one day I sat alone on the bus and that same boy came up to me and asked if he could sit beside me. Obviously I said yes and he just sat there. The conversation started when he noticed a fellow student running after the bus and he talked to me about how much it would suck to be in his shoes. And we just went off from that point. That same day we got each other’s number and started texting endlessly.
We talked about gaming and so many other things. We basically got to know each other in like a month. Feelings immediately started with each other so you may say in a way we “clicked” just like that.
On 4/11/13 I promised to meet him at the college where we would just hang out and right there we had our first kiss and decided that same day we’d be more than friends.
I can honestly say I have never been more grateful to the Universe that this happened to me. Looking back I am grateful that I had experienced those dark times as a lesson so my relationship right now will be so much better. I am forever grateful and will keep on practicing The Secret in our relationship.
So thank you Rhonda and your amazing Team and Thank you Universe, for everything!