HARASSED IN EVERY JOB
For years I was getting angrier and angrier in jobs. I always seemed to find the worst possible employer to work for. It was all God’s fault, and the angrier I got at God, the worse things seemed to get and the more I hated God.
When I started working for a local printer doing electronic pre-press, I was always looking around to see if this was going to be the same-old-same-old, or if this place might be different. As far as I could see, everyone was great to work with. I was actually having a good time and enjoying my coworkers and supervisor – until, three months after I started, the printer decided to branch out into digital printing and asked if I would do the electronic pre-press for the new digital printer. I said, “Sure, I’d love to.”
They made the one guy who couldn’t get along with anyone my supervisor. He harassed me, left mean notes on my chair when I went to lunch, and was making an enormous number of errors that he blamed on me.
Long story short, they fired me after six months.
I felt suicidal. I thought it was over. I was sick of this. I saw God up there laughing at me. I hated like I’d never hated in my life.
A friend gave me The Secret DVD, and I saw for the first time how I had created that whole reality of being harassed in every job I had. It all made so much sense. My thoughts had been: He better not talk to me like that again; Why is it I always end up next to the most difficult person in the company to work with?; I’m not good enough, I hope I don’t get fired; I hope they don’t figure out that I don’t know what I’m doing; I hope they don’t figure out I’m a fake . . . Those are just some of the many negative thoughts that were constantly going through my mind.
I wrote down all those thoughts, I looked at them in all their problematic ugliness, and I wrote their opposite positive thoughts on the other side of the page. At first it felt worse, so I rephrased the positive thoughts as questions and desires: “What would it feel like to know I can work with easygoing, moral people? What would it feel like to make more money than I’ve ever made before? I’d love to work for a publisher one day; that would be cool; I want to be working by [and filled in the date].”
On the very date I’d filled in, I got called for an interview with a publisher and got the job. Although I am no longer at that job, my coworkers were among the most easygoing, understanding, and moral people I’d ever met. I’d had no idea companies like that really existed.
And yes, I was making more money than I’d ever made in the past.
Do I still get fearful thoughts? Yes. Do I entertain them? Not for long. I know I don’t have to. Before, I didn’t know I had a choice. Now, when a negative thought comes up, I focus on its opposite, or if that’s too extreme for me to comprehend at the moment, I change it to a question: “What would it feel like if . . . ?” And that has been a very powerful tool for me.
I’m definitely not perfect at this. I take a few steps backward some days, more often than I like to admit. But I’m now running my own small business and making even more money than I have in the past. My business is growing rapidly, and I’m at a point where I need to start thinking of expanding to the next level.
I hope everyone out there gives this a shot. It really works. And if it doesn’t work for you, ask, “What would it feel like if it DID work for me?” And it will work.