Breaking The Surface.
Growing up, I had a very rough childhood. My mother and father separated in my early years. This in itself brings problems to many kids. One of my first memories at that age was being in my first school. I remember my mother coming into school flustered and panicked. I was so confused as she asked for me and my other family members to leave. I remember getting in the car and leaving. Not to the home I once knew, but out into the scary, frightening world of the unknown.
We went into a refuge with other abused women. Being so young, I never knew what had happened until I got older. My mother was the one being abused and it had a significant effect on my life. We moved around constantly, from refuge to refuge until finally, we found our first home.
This was where I met my first real friends, real teachers, and a real chance to start life again. We met another family in our time over in York. So kind, so helpful, and so genuine. At least we thought.
At that point we were used to moving around a lot, it was kind of in our nature never to be in one place too long. So off we moved again. We had built a relationship with the other family we met in York that was strong. We never broke communication and often had visits between us. Unfortunately, this wasn’t the happy ending we hoped for. My mother was oblivious that the family member we met, abused her children. Including myself. This went on for years and years. We never knew any different. We were molested and it destroyed our sense of privacy and trust and none of our family has ever fully recovered. I suffered from anxiety, depression, self-hatred, trust issues, relationship issues, and communication issues. So many underlying complications arose from this horrendous act. Don’t get me wrong, there were years that were better than some. Especially after we told my mother what had been happening and the man was sentenced. However, some things never leave you and my mind had felt trapped for a long time.
One day, I was meeting a friend who had this book. The book was called The Power of Now. I know this has nothing to do with The Secret and the way of life, but this book helped me to get rid of the feelings of being trapped and being open to other suggestions on how to move forward in my life. So after I read the first chapters of the book, I was left with goosebumps from how life-changing it was. I’d never read a book thoroughly before.
Afterward, my friend introduced to me other books he had. Which is when I came across The Secret. Being a skeptical person with the attitude of having to see to believe, I never thought for one second that this book would work. Again, I was open to trying anything. On a daily basis, I read the book and applied myself fully to living the life I wanted, not what I didn’t want. I changed my thoughts of not wanting to be depressed, not wanting to be lonely, and not wanting to be trapped. Instead, I focused on thoughts of wanting to be loved, wanting to be happy, and wanting to be free.
And to my surprise, things changed within months. I stopped taking drugs because I no longer felt the need. The drugs were a painkiller but this book was better. I started taking long walks and appreciating my surroundings. I would often talk to my friends more openly about how much better I felt, and things would only get better. I was happier. Much happier. I managed to meet a wonderful girl. She was amazing and I’d never thought for a second I would ever be loved. We spoke for a while and no, it never lasted or turned into something special, but what it did do was open my eyes. It showed me I’m absolutely capable of love.
I started to use visualization. I was in a little bit of debt so I just imagined I wasn’t. I didn’t ignore the debt but I didn’t think about it. I lived as if I had all the money in the world and within a few months, I got a pay raise at work. Not millions or thousands but it helped tremendously. I was so in awe that this actually worked! Now I’m currently visualizing my driving license. I’m going to buy my car on Thursday and can’t wait to get on the road.
I just wanted to share this story because I know everybody has one. The circumstances are limitless but so are the opportunities. I’ve never been so thankful for something to appear in my life and I’m so glad I’ve been through everything I have because otherwise, I wouldn’t have found this book!